Shit Vids: Garth Brooks “Standing Outside the Fire”

When Jezy nominated this video as a “Shit Vids” candidate my first thought was: “Does he hate the mentally challenged?”

I should come clear and admit that the first cassette tape I ever owned was Garth Brooks’ Ropin’ the Wind.  To a kid who lived in the country surrounded by pet cows who would regularly bump into our giant satellite dish, rendering it impossible to see “Thundercats” through the static, the album was a godsend.  Why I never became a professional bull rider is still a question I wrestle with every morning as I put the first dip of Skoal in my lip.

Anyway, this video is retarded.  It’s one of those condescending pop culture moments, like I Am Sam, “Life Goes On“, or Sean Hannity’s career, that attempts to show us that mentally challenged people can do anything.  Instead of being a heartwarming inspiration, these things usually just end up being exploitative.  And, or, they gravely misuse Beatles songs.

So, in this video we have a bucolic kid with Downs Syndrome who wants to try out for his high school’s regular track and field event rather than the Special Olympics version.  Mom like this idea.  Dad and coach no like this idea.  Think idea bad idea.

His mother is a constant encouraging force, even going so far as to let the boy nearly run over some high school chicks in her car (0:29).  And you thought Student Drivers were a terrorizing presence on the road!  What the father says at 1:08 is called “foreshadowing”.  Inexplicably, at 1:58, Garth decides this is a Metallica video, complete with fire and The Hetfield Evil Eye.  Or did the kid literally torch his school by running so damn fast?  Make sure you keep watching because at 2:30 comes one of the most dramatic moments in CMT history.  It might also be called “child abuse”.

Chris

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3 responses to “Shit Vids: Garth Brooks “Standing Outside the Fire”

  1. I have only one comment: “Cowboy Muscle Show”.

  2. I’m going to hell I guess. Pretty hilarious.

    fuckin’ chris gaines

  3. Brought to you by Friends of Sarah Palin.

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